PARODY IN PARADISE
By: Iris P. Concepcion

I went to an island and originally thought of staying there for three hours. Dare we not see Madonna's ex in fly suit and a Green Hornet's sidekick----nahh, make it (Fantasy Island) Ricardo Montalban's, midget support driving. My boy still nuked frankienstein though with a cast fit for the gods.

It is a maze but you wouldn't understand this bit if you do not populate my universe.

It is not the middle. It is the beginning and the end that eventually mattered.

I decided to test its waters. Changed plan and decided to swim. Got a room (within a budget) and looked at the people.

There is something wrong with the picture.

Now:

I could not complain of the immaculate seashore and the teasing bancas and whatnot-------until I picked the portion of the lacking puzzle.It is the absence of connection.

People wading in water are so detached from Nature; they walk like frozen frisbees. They speak in malicious tongues. I simply listen, get the feel of the waves. Perhaps, in another set-up, they prefer walking with shopping bags. They seem to abhor the water they are dipping themselves unto.

Then:

I saw the most ridiculous trio of girls, dark as Africa, lean as miscast supermodels pass by my observing self and it is the best comedy of errors gone right. Finally, thy passionate muses of Salem's lot learned enough and walked MY talk. I have never been prouder of their transformation. Those are your most delectable selves; when you no longer pretend.

I also saw a super heavyweight girl in a two-piece number; her bikini is not bikini. It is mother's UNDERWEAR. Feel the gong! In white, with stitched butterfly. I shall give her a hundred per cent for sheer spunk. She reminds me so much of the girl with those rolling eyes.

Like the rest of the evening spent in mischief, I stayed all night musing over how the fan on my headboard could be used by giants in sweltering heat; I remembered the better other in another time capsule saying the most ridiculous things i.e. "Bakit kayo nagbubulyawan?" He is corny that way.

I felt detached too but remembering the one finely vocalized "SHUT UP" by him when someone gave me a bad holler (he almost choked; his cheeks widened; controlling his anger)---that is when I felt so loved.

Then: someone gave me free coffee in the morning. Small thing; but it made the parody well-placed.

Finally, my people are fighting back with class and I dare say, TRUE professionalism. They are learning from this corn and they too love the cob on it.

Hats' off.